It’s fun to make up April Fools’ Day news headlines. But it’s never smart to mislead people looking for real news. Always causing mischief, Sid, The Aberdeen Insider mascot, came up with these satirical headlines. If you don’t have a sense of humor, it might be best to stop reading now. If you do, we hope these amuse you:
- Roundabouts planned as part of two-way Main Street conversion
- Brown County Fair announces new grandstand, return of Taylor Swift in 2025
- Plan goes awry after cattle picket in front of local beef processing plant
- Northern State to downsize, move to former Presentation campus
- Qdoba rock files lawsuit after being ‘repeatedly struck by negligent motorists’
- Aberdeen Insider sold to Gannett for pheasant sandwich, McQuillen moving to Arkansas
- City discovers covert network of tunnels connected to Kline Street storm drain
- Citing landowner concerns, Summit Carbon Solutions scraps pipeline plan
- Noem to donate new smile to Trump in first-of-its-kind transplant
- Disoriented Biden gets lost in White House Rose Garden
- Vowing financial solvency, Hub City Hotshots plan return to Aberdeen
- American flag redesign contest announced as Dakotas decide to merge
- Levsen, Schaunaman join forces, make late presidential bid
- South Dakota voters OK recreational marijuana, new era of prohibition
- Drivers run into opposite sides of pizza shop within 30 minutes of each other
- Four-story garage to replace Capitol Theatre as solution to downtown parking woes
- Walmart claims to have original Aberdeen recipe for tiger meat
- Former Natural Abundance building collapses beneath 19 inches of April snow
- Fastest roller coaster in U.S. being installed at Storybook Land after wrong ride delivered
- Aberdeen Wings to host Stanley Cup champion Golden Knights in exhibition
- Flush with cash, Brown County foregoes new jail in favor of event center in Barnard
- Amtrak to serve South Dakota with line between Ipswich, Madison
- Circus chicken wing sauce hailed as solution to Aberdeen water shortage
- Write-in votes propel Toby Doeden to victory in U.S. House race
- Bruce Springsteen poetry reading, drum circle slated for May 3 at Red Rooster Coffee House
- Aberdeen’s Hamm’s Cup badminton tournament to be part of new professional tour